andamu

[ meandering ] The days suddenly seem to have become so short. Then, this morning while checking the day's forecast, I noticed that sunrise was at 6.31 a.m. and sunset at 7.48 p.m. That's 13 hours and 17 minutes of daylight! Some checking around the internet revealed that in all my first 27 years I had never had more than 13:45 of daylight (the length of the day at summer solstice where I grew up). Thus, objectively these days should have seemed very long to me. And yet, when looking at it more subjectively, I notice that at the summer solstice here it is just a few minutes shy of 16 hours of daylight, and thus in the past couple of months I have lost almost three hours in the day. Yes I know, I am being far too analytical, but it seems to restore some appearance of control to my life when I can prove that my experience is grounded in reality. :: [ life ] When the alarm turns on the radio these days it is still dark outside, although by the time I leave for the lab around 7 a.m. the sun is up properly; Monday's early morning drive to work from the hospital through fog and pre-dawn gloom heralds that which lies in wait for me as winter approaches. Today was cooler, and started out cloudy, but the promised rain did not materialize (as far as I could see). The wind is blowing quite strongly though, and now the sky is a beautifully crisp blue. Despite my five years in the States I have not yet acquired the habit of thinking in terms of Memorial Day and Labor Day bracketing summer. I suppose part of the reason is that I have never taken a summer off, even while studying. Also summer is in some ways the season I like least. I dislike heat, especially when coupled with humidity. Our apartment is a corner unit facing South and West, and in summer it is a heat trap, with the large windows of the bedrooms exposed to the full afternoon sun. So, while I am a little sad to see some of the daylight going, I am welcoming any cooler days with open arms. ::

[ vistas ]

And with Labor Day just around the corner, I can see definite signs of approaching Fall. The trees lining the picture windows all along the lab are fully laden with berries - still green at this stage - and the trees out in the parking lot are starting to get tinged with red, like maidenly blushes, on one side. At lunch I grabbed the camera and headed outside. It was still overcast, but quite bright, and I snapped a few pictures. As I walked back, I noticed the big old tree on the little rise had some large pale flowers. I don't normally pass it on my way in to work, and hadn't noticed the flowers before. I went clambering around and up to get a closer shot at it, and John told me it was a dogwood. He mentioned that they don't normally flower this late in the season, speculating that it was a sign of distress. :: [ grind ] I am still having difficulty shaking this sluggish feeling. At first I thought it was just the anxiety over mpo's procedure. Then I wondered if I could be coming down with something, especially with the touch of sore throat and earache I've experienced. Now I am considering other options. When I am interacting with someone, at work or at home, I can feel quite normal and even animated. As soon as the interaction is complete, it feels as if a weight is pulling down at my shoulders, making it tough to move or even think. I hope the break in routine with the long weekend and our trip afterwards will help me snap out of it. It might help also if I could get some decent sleep!